Warm, Nonjudgmental, Solution-Oriented Help With A Compassionate No-Nonsense Approach by a Dually Licensed Marriage Counselor and Clinical Psychologist
Reuben E. Gross, PhD, LMFT, ABP, ABPP, FAACP
Clinical Member, American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy Diplomate in Psychotherapy, American Board of Psychotherapy Diplomate in Clinical Psychology, American Board of Professional Psychology Fellow, American Academy of Clinical Psychology
Marriage Counseling, Pre-Marital Counseling and Couples Therapy for Couples of All Ages.Click here for five articles on this subject.
Individual Counseling and Therapy for Anger Management and a Variety of Personal and Interpersonal Problems.
Training Program for: Complaining & Arguing Diplomatically Without Fighting.Click here.
Effective Communication & Problem Solving Skills for Long term Marital Harmony.Click here for five articles
Same Day Appointments for Crisis Situations
About Reuben E. Gross, PhD, LMFT
Reuben E. Gross, PhD, LMFT (Licensed Marriage Counselor NJ & Family Therapist) offers warm, active, nonjudgmental, empathic, solution-oriented couples counseling, couples therapy and relationship counseling. He is a highly trained, credentialed, experienced, and caring Marriage Counselor and Psychologist, Licensed In the State of New York as a Psychologist, and in NJ by the New Jersey State Board of Marriage Counselors, and the New Jersey State Board of Psychologists.
Dr. Gross has been in private practice for close to four decades in Teaneck, NJ, Bergen County, with a concurrent practice in New York City while teaching and supervising marriage counselors and psychotherapists, and serving as a professor or clinical supervisor at universities and psychological clinics. He has also chaired professional presentations at annual conferences of the NJ Psychological Association and conducted marital enhancement and couples therapy workshops and communication seminars for married and premarital couples at the Teaneck Community Education Center in Teaneck, New Jersey. For a full description of Dr. Gross' credentials, resume and theoretical orientation, please click here.
Dr. Gross, LMFT is a very down-to-earth person who offers a practical approach to marriage and premarital counseling, couples counseling, and individual psychotherapy when one member of the couple needs a little more individual attention. As highly trained and very experienced marriage counselor and psychologist, he will help you address your individual or couple problems beginning with the first session with highly structured, solution-oriented counseling techniques, and he is geared to working with you as rapidly as possible. He will treat you with respect, dignity, and compassion and will insure maximum confidentiality.
Relationship Counseling for Both Married and Unmarried Couples
Marriage counseling and premarital counseling (aka relationship counseling, couples therapy) is an educational experience that emphasizes self-exploration, self-revelation, and the acquisition of interactive skills, which promote mutual understanding, recognition, respect, appreciation of your partner, and the ability to fulfill your own as well as your partner's expectations in marriage. Other goals of relationship help include learning, developing, and practicing in session with Dr. Gross, and at home, via homework assignments, techniques for constructive communication and conflict-resolution for long-term marital harmony. This approach equips you and your partner with lifetime tools that will enable you to honestly and effectively confront and resolve whatever problems may arise in the future in addition to enhancing your relationship and creating a lifelong harmonious setting with each other. Please click here for six articles on "How Does Marriage And Couple Counseling Work?"
In marriage, or relationship counseling, for married and unmarried couples, Dr. Gross has a highly developed training program to help couples improve their communication on an emotional level as well as on an intellectual level, and grow in their ability to listen and understand their spouse's point of view, and his/her reasons for taking that position. This program is particularly helpful with couples who argue futilely, escalate into fights, or, to protect themselves, withdraw during arguments/fights without resolving their differences, or have become so discouraged that they have virtually stopped communicating altogether about personal relationship issues, or any other sensitive matter and live a roommate type of existence.
As an experienced marriage therapist and an expert in communication, Dr. Gross will teach you constructive communication skills, which will enable you and your partner to explore problems as a team and come up with solutions that meet both of your needs. For more information on this subject, please click here for my article "The A-B-C's of Communication." You may also be interested in my article "How to Complain Diplomatically and Argue Constructively Without Fighting: Looking for a Win-Win Situation" click here and for other articles on developing effective communication skills.
Dr. Gross will help you with a wide variety of other problems and the resulting negative emotions that come to the fore. Couples often report frustration, disappointment, hurt, anger, loneliness, pain and depression due to lack of understanding, diminished affection, loss of friendship, infrequent sex, emotional separation and a general lack of togetherness. Additional areas of concern may involve lack of respect for partner's opinions or feelings, insensitivity to each other's emotional needs and disproportionate outbursts of anger. Dr. Gross will help you explore, evaluate, and agree upon your respective roles and responsibilities to each other, to children (if any, from this or a previous relationship), the day-to-day tasks of living and loving, and making plans for the present and future with each other. In the event that your spouse resists marriage counseling, please clickherefor "What if Only One Person is Motivated?"click herefor "Spouse Resists Marriage Counseling."
Other problems that bring couples to marriage counselors may center about money, interference from in laws, anger management, activities of partner outside of the home, "friend" relationships with ex lovers or ex spouses. Dr. Gross is very skilled when working with problems of infidelity. One of his specialties is his work with crisis situations such as the discovery of online, or in-person, emotional attachments with a member of the opposite sex, as well as lying and suspected --or admitted-- physical intimacy, and the consequent emergence of feelings of shock, betrayal, depression, anxiety, anger, lack of trust and numerous other emotions which shake the equilibrium of the hurt party and sometimes threaten the future of the marriage. For more information on this shattering experience, click herefor his article "Can There be a Silver Lining Around The Cloud of Infidelity?"
Reducing Conflict of Couples is Half of the Goal Increasing Harmony and Joy is the Other Half
In addition to helping your reduce the frequency and intensity of your negative interactions, Dr. Gross will help you revive your love relationship with exercises that stimulate expressions of praise, and appreciation to each other on a regular basis. He works with you on exercises that help you reveal to your partner your emotional needs. He will encourage a commitment from each of you to attend to and fulfill those stated needs as much as possible and to engage in enjoyable activities which will enhance your relationship and serve to blend you as a couple. Click herefor "The Hidden Agenda in Marriage."
People marry to increase their happiness, not their misery. Nor do they marry to feel alone in the relationship or to spend the rest of their life in frustration, strife, and pain. They want to enjoy life, have fun, and share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences with their spouse in all the complexities of the relationship (partner, companion, friend, playmate...etc). Spouses want to grow together as they age, not apart. Dr. Gross' goal is to help you recapture the love, romance, mutual goodwill, togetherness, kindness, and teamwork that characterized your relationship at its height, or better. This will come about with a greater understanding of --and sensitivity to-- each other's needs and an increased knowledge of what marriage is all about. When you express your new commitment and attitudes to your partner by putting into practice numerous caring behaviors and pleasurable joint activities, you will come closer to your aspired goals with each other, and greatly increase your chances of rekindling some of the magic that characterized the beginning of your relationship.
I Offer Daytime, Evening & Occasional Weekend Hours, Prompt Return of Calls, and Emergency Appointments Upon Request.
Call (201) 837-0066 in Bergen County, NJ to speak with a solution-oriented Dually Licensed NJ Psychologist and Marriage Counselor with 39 years of experience helping couples achieve harmony, peace and love.
The quickest way to reach Dr. Gross is by phone
With effort and commitment you CAN achieve your goals!